Saturday, 22 October 2011

40 Reasons Why 1984 and 1986 are Cinema’s Golden Years


I don’t know anything about astronomy.  Maybe it’s because one was the year of the rat and the other the tiger.  Maybe their combined sum of 3970 has some kind of cosmic significance, like the number 42 in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.


Whatever the reason, 1984 and 1986 are indisputably the two greatest years since pictures were first put into motion.


The evidence is compelling:


1984

1. Ghostbusters




2. Beverly Hills Cop





3. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom





4. The Terminator






5. A Nightmare on Elm Street





6. Blood Simple




7. Gremlins




8. The Karate Kid




9. Starman



10. Police Academy




11. Romancing the Stone





12. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock 




13. Splash





14. Top Secret!




15. Red Dawn



16. 1984






17. Once Upon a Time in America






18. Amadeus 






19. This is Spinal Tap






20. Footloose





1986

21. Top Gun




22. Crocodile Dundee




23. Blue Velvet




24. Platoon





25. The Fly




26. Manhunter




27. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home




28. Aliens




29. The Color of Money




30. Stand By Me




31. Big Trouble in Little China





32. Ferris Bueller's Day Off





33. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer





34. The Hitcher





35. Short Circuit



36. Critters






37. Salvador






38. Pretty in Pink






39. Highlander






40. Labyrinth





Boody hell!  If a Fahrenheit 451-style totalitarian government destroyed all movies and just left titles from 1984 and 1986, I’d still be happy.  In fact, I’d probably be happier.


Frankly, if you can’t find anything to like then you should donate your DVD player to the Red Cross and your corneas to medical science.


Face/Off (1997)


Starring: John Travolta, Nicolas Cage, 
Joan Allen, Alessandro Nivola, Gina Gershon

Directed by: John Woo

Written by: Mike Werb, Michael Colleary

Duration: 2hrs 21mins

Rating: 5 out of 5


Face/Off is something of a historical artefact.  It marks one of those all too rare moments in the cinematic medium where every element fits perfectly to create a product of the very highest calibre. 

The movie was a turning point in the careers of the three main players.  It’s essentially John Woo’s Greatest Hits.  His central preoccupation of two men on either sides of the law with interconnected fates is stretched to a supremely absurd degree; there’s a tense scene in a hospital; a shoot-out with a child in the middle; a climax in a church...  But just like many greatest hits albums, it ultimately turned out to be something of a eulogy – Woo hasn't made a decent film since.

THIS WAS SOON TO BECOME...
...THIS

For Travolta, it was the apex of his mid-90s comeback, before self-indulgence (Battlefield Earth), several repetitive bad-guy roles and films with ‘Hogs’ or ‘Dogs’ in the title eroded away any retro-cool he’d clawed back.


And as for Cage, it was the end of his short-lived stint as an action movie go-to guy and the start of a slide into farce and IRS-influenced role choices.

CAGE TRANSCENDS CAPTIONING
It's the last truly great action movie of the ‘90s, before The Matrix came along two years later to suck the fun out of the genre and replace it with clod-psychology and tension-free video game cut-scene shoot outs.  The next time an action movie was this much fun was 2007's Shoot 'em Up. 


I WOULD HAVE SEEN THIS MOVIE 
BASED ON THIS  IMAGE ALONE
But Face/Off also manages to provide a surprising amount of pathos, which is delivered in spades by a cast who wouldn’t look out of place on something ‘worthier’ –  as well as the two leads on top form we have the likes of Joan Allen and Alesandro Nivola giving performances with depth and subtlety.  It has a raw, almost Shakespearian gravitas: Castor Troy kills his way to the top like a gun-toting Richard III; Sean Archer is a Hamlet figure, motived by a revenge that threatens to drive him bonkers; mistaken identity forms the crux of the plot; two families are central, with sons, brothers and sisters all perishing in the carnage.  I salivate to think how amazing Romeo + Juliet could have been in the Hong Kong maestro’s hands – Baz Luhrmann’s take was just campy Day-Glo Woo, after all. 

"SEE ANYTHING YOU LIKE?"

A master craftsman working with the right people at the exactly right time in an aligning of the planets which, unless Woo re-teams with Chow Yun-Fat, we are unlikely to be treated to ever again.  *****


21 Stars Unlikely to Ever Win an Oscar



Certain actors are firm favourites of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, with nominations up to their eyeballs and another win seemingly never far away – your Streeps and Winslets, your Nicolsons and Penns.

And then there are some who – for various reasons – seem destined to never clutch that shiny little man and embarrass themselves with an over-emotional speech, however hard (or not) they may try…



TUX PURCHASE NOT STRICTLY NECESSARY

1. Donald Sutherland
Shockingly, has never even been nominated in either the main or supporting actor categories.  A pretty inexplicable snub for the respected, 40-year career actor –  nothing for Klute, nothing for Ordinary People, nothing for M*A*S*H.  Shameful.



2. Harvey Keitel
Despite starring in Mean Streets and delivering a memorable turn in Taxi Driver, le Harve has never really set the acting world alight in the same way as his contemporaries like De Niro, Pacino, Hoffman and Hackman.  Except for a supporting nom for Bugsy he’s never registered on the Oscar radar. He does show his own little man a lot which is... er, something.  

3. John Cusack
The male Cusack sibling has avoided Oscar-baiting roles his whole career – and with recent turns in 2012 and Hot Tub Time Machine, that trend doesn’t look like ending any time soon. 

4. Jennifer Jason Leigh
MALE MIDDLE NAME  CONFUSES THE PANEL?
Working solidly and impressively for 30 years, but never quite broken through into the mainstream a role that has made the Academy really sit up and take notice.  A Sutherland-sized travesty.



5. Sharon Stone
Chose to enter her acting twilight by reprising her breakthrough role in Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction. Sadly for Sharon, few actors have earned critical acclaim for movies in which they've co-starred with Stan Collymore. 

6. Keifer Sutherland 
A classic victim of finding TV success just as he was getting to prime awards-baiting age. Now so well-known as Jack Bauer that identikit undemanding roles in the likes of The Sentinel beckon long into the horizon.  Seems to enjoy partying rather more than acting. 


"GENERIC ROMCOM #34? SIGN ME UP!"

7. Kate Hudson 
Started well with a supporting nomination for Almost Famous, but her career trajectory has drifted into romcom territory, including far too many appearances with our next entry.  

8. Matthew McConaughey
The many-abbed one is indisputably Hollywood’s current romcom king. This is not an accolade Mr. McConaughey should be in any way proud of.  


9. Cameron Diaz
The Sweetest Thing is the kind of sin that is hard to forgive and forget.  Tries hard with efforts like Being John Malkovich and The Box, but would really need to 'do a Theron' for voters to get past the big smile and California blondeness. 

BUTLER'S LACK OF RECOGNITION FOR
THE UGLY TRUTH STILL RILES

10. Gerard Butler
Sort of the midpoint between McConaughey and Jason Statham, splitting his time equally between romcoms and hard man roles.  The result is little inspiration in either. 

11. Christian Slater
Never likely to receive the same kind of love as his acting role model Jack Nicolson, unless there was an award for best performance by an actor’s eyebrows. 

12. Patricia Arquette
Slater’s True Romance co-star has suffered the same fate as Sutherland Jr. by fronting a too-successful TV series, psychic cobblers Medium. 


"WHY HAVE YOU TURNED UP TO THE OSCARS, RICH?"
"I GOT NOWHERE ELSE TO GOOOOOO!"
13. Richard Gere
Less an actual actor than a clothes horse for female fantasies – Armarni-clad stud in American Gigolo, navy whites for An Officer And A Gentleman, tailored tux in Pretty Woman.  





14. Demi Moore
Career seriously nosedived after the disaster that was Striptease and has never recovered. Preferred medium of expression nowadays is Twitter.


15. Harrison Ford
Single nom only for Witness.  Not that it's ever seemed to bother the famously laid-back star.
BUT HE SURE KNOWS HOW TO CUT LOOSE




16. Kevin Bacon
Solid in Murder in the First and The Woodsman, but sadly it seems that some people will never forget Footloose. 
Jeeze Louise!



17. Bruce Willis
Should have been nominated for Pulp Fiction, but Miramax campaigned for Sam Jackson and Travolta (see below) instead.

SAM MAKES A SPECTACLE OF HIMSELF


18. Samuel L. Jackson
Should have won for Pulp Fiction.   His quantity over quality approach to choosing roles has not done him any favours.

19. John Travolta
Nominations for Saturday Night Fever and Pulp seem a loooong time ago.


20. Winona Ryder
BOLDLY GOING WITHOUT
What happened to her career?  Playing Spock’s mum in a near-cameo is not what you would call a comeback.

21. Johnny Depp
Certainly talented enough, but far too out-there to ever sway a panel of traditionalists, despite a pair of recent nominations.